‘Despicable Me 3’ Reemerges as Despicably Dull

Rating: 1.5/5.0

CHICAGO – This is it. The point where Gru and his Minions went from mildly irritating to excruciating. The series will undoubtedly entertain the children it’s intended for, my twins probably would have liked it if they had been able to come. But pity the poor parents who have to sit through another film full of Minion fart noises… which seems to last for roughly three whole days.

The movie starts off with Gru (voice of Steve Carrell) and his now wife Lucy (Kristen Wiig) being drummed out of the anti-villains league after letting a super villain named Evil Bratt (Trey Parker) slip through their fingers. Bratt was the child star of an 1980s sitcom who let his mischievous TV alter-ego go to his head after he hit puberty.

Gru and Dru (both voiced by Steve Carell) are Bonding in ‘Despicable Me 3’
Photo credit: Universal Pictures

Now I happen to love the 80’s, but every joke here is of the worn out seen it a thousand times before variety – starting with Evil Bratt’s hairstyle, which is part mullet part flattop. He’s decked out in shoulder pads which shoot bubble gum, and a moustache straight out of “Simon & Simon.“ There’s even an 80’s robot, but he’s not half as charming here as he was in “The Muppets.” The one saving grace is at least the movie gets good mileage out of its soundtrack including the predictable, but still reliable, “Bad” by Michael Jackson.

For a movie that is squarely aimed at kids, screenwriters Cinco Paul and Ken Daurio cram in a lot of stuff about unemployment, motherhood, and struggles of parenting that holds no appeal for the target audience, and does nothing to satiate the adults who stuck to their seats… it only serves to prolong the misery.

Proving two of Gru is not twice as nice, “Despicable Me 3” comes up with a long lost twin brother named Dru. Dru has the long flowing locks of Fabio on top of the same disproportionately grotesque body as his brother. and he’s more successful than the down-on- his-luck Gru. Both are voiced by Steve Carell with a minimum of differentiation… and neither one is even the slightest bit amusing.

The Minions Do Prison Stuff in ‘Despicable Me 3’
Photo credit: Universal Pictures

Meanwhile the Minions don’t completely take over the storyline the way they did last time. Eager to return to the life of crime, the Minions rebel against Gru and walk out. And in a series of circumstances which serve to cross promote another Illumination Entertainment feature, the yellow wackos wind up behind bars. Why? Apparently because someone thought that Minions acting out ancient tropes of prison movies would be funny, right down to the shower scene. I was unmoved.

Like I said, kids will probably be entertained and this movie will undoubtedly make a mint’s worth of money, so the Minions won’t be going anywhere anytime soon. But my advice to parents – if you can shirk this duty and find something else to do, by all means do so. Otherwise it might be the longest 84 minutes of your entire holiday week.

[20]	By SPIKE WALTERS [21] Contributor HollywoodChicago.com spike@hollywoodchicago.com [20]