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David Koechner

Film Review: Horror Spoof ‘A Haunted House’ is Pretty Horrible

CHICAGO – There is one funny line in “A Haunted House,” the new horror spoof starring Marlon Wayans. It’s “my foot has a cramp, don’t touch it.” The rest of the film is stunningly without humor, relying on a series of flatulence, sex and failed jokes to dauntingly fill the long, long 95 minutes.

Film Review: Numbingly Stupid ‘Piranha 3DD’ is BaDD

CHICAGO – “Piranha 3D” was a flawed film to be certain but it looks like a horror/comedy masterpiece compared to the dull mess that is the virtually straight-to-DVD follow-up, “Piranha 3DD,” opening on a whopping 75 screens today and also available On Demand.

Blu-ray Review: ‘Final Destination 5’ Succumbs to Fitfully Amusing Silliness

Final Destination 5 Thumb

CHICAGO – There’s no question that the “Final Destination” series is among the most lame-brained, ill-conceived, lazily executed franchises in Hollywood history. Every installment follows the exact same plot formula, from the opening catastrophe to the bleak epilogue. There isn’t a single surprise or quality scare in these pictures, and yet they still continue to make copious amounts of money.

Film Review: ‘Final Destination 5’ Plays Like 3D Cartoon For Horror Fans

CHICAGO – The “Final Destination” movies have become an increasingly-excessive orgy of gore with a twisted sense of humor – the Grim Reaper isn’t just coming for you, he’s going to have some fun before you go.

TV Review: ‘Glory Daze’ Plays Like Boring Rip-Off of ‘Animal House’

CHICAGO – “National Lampoon’s Animal House” does not seem to want to leave us. It rears its bathroom-humor head on a regular basis in TV and movies. But rarely is a tribute to the iconic frat house comedy so blatant as TBS’ new comedy “Glory Daze,” debuting tonight, November 16th, 2010.

Blu-Ray Review: Bonus-Heavy Release of Will Ferrell’s Beloved ‘Anchorman’

Anchorman

CHICAGO – “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy” is one of the most beloved comedies of the ’00s, a film that may have failed to crack $100 million on its initial release but has legions of fans who now know the entire script by heart after dozens of DVD and cable viewings. Like many comedy hits, Adam McKay’s directorial debut has been given the gift set treatment complete with collectibles and hours of special features. It’s exclusive to Best Buy for the next few months but we have a look at it for you now.

‘The Perfect Game’ Proves That Baseball Fiction is Duller Than Truth

The Perfect Game

CHICAGO – The 1957 Little League team from Monterrey, Mexico, was the first non-U.S. team to win that league’s World Series. That is a fact. “The Perfect Game” creates a story based on that fact that is as improbable as a team from Mars winning the big game.

TV Review: Kelsey Grammer Should Know Better Than ‘Hank’

CHICAGO – Kelsey Grammer is such a TV veteran, a major part of two of the best sitcoms in the history of the medium in “Cheers” and “Frasier,” that it makes his decision to do something as generic, predictable, and unfunny as ABC’s “Hank” all the more disappointing. You would think he knew better by now.


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TV, DVD, BLU-RAY & THEATER REVIEWS

  • Open Road Blu-ray

    CHICAGO – So you’re a young woman who decides to fall asleep in your car parked just off the highway. You’re awoken by the rapping fist of a chiseled cop who leers at you with the sexual appetite of a drooling wolf. Sounds like a meet cute straight out of Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho.” But in Marcio Garcia’s head-slapping dud, “Open Road,” it’s supposed to be heartwarming.

  • Hostages

    CHICAGO – The five broadcast networks have announced their Fall 2013 schedules and so it’s now easy to see them night by night, timeslot by timeslot. Which timeslots seem the most competitive? Do you know what you’re going to watch or schedule in your DVR? Here’s the chart you need to figure it out.

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