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Chris Massoglia

Blu-Ray Review: ‘Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant’ Totally Sucks

Cirque du Freak

CHICAGO – It’s now official: the Weitz brothers have proven that they are the wrong people to make vampire movies. While Chris got tangled in the turgid melodrama of “Twilight: New Moon,” Paul tried to inject irreverent humor into the first installment of another gloomy franchise, based on Darren O’Shaughnessy’s book series detailing the adventures of adolescent vampire Darren Shan.


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TV, DVD, BLU-RAY & THEATER REVIEWS

  • The Goodwin Games

    CHICAGO – “The Goodwin Games” is bad, bad, bad. You know a show is likely to be awful when a network cuts back the order and buries its premiere in a time of year when most people are getting outside or going to see Summer blockbusters. While the networks are busy promoting Fall 2013 at Upfronts, who cares about a new show that won’t make it more than two months? And yet there is sometimes reason for hope that a network executive just missed the humor and is actually burying a hidden gem. Hope dies at “The Goodwin Games” and I wish they had buried it deeper.

  • Open Road Blu-ray

    CHICAGO – So you’re a young woman who decides to fall asleep in your car parked just off the highway. You’re awoken by the rapping fist of a chiseled cop who leers at you with the sexual appetite of a drooling wolf. Sounds like a meet cute straight out of Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho.” But in Marcio Garcia’s head-slapping dud, “Open Road,” it’s supposed to be heartwarming.

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