Video Game Review: ‘Naughty Bear’ Deserves Punishment

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CHICAGO – On paper, “Naughty Bear” sounded like a great summer video game alternative. Where most games fit into a pretty definable niche like shooter, sports game, RPG, etc., how do you categorize a game about a maniacal teddy bear killing off his teddy bear friends in unique and blood-curdling ways? Sadly, “Naughty Bear” merely proves that originality only gets you so far. You still need to make a good game.

Video Game Rating: 1.5/5.0

“Naughty Bear” could have been an effective and enjoyable downloadable title for around $10 or even $15. At $49.99, it’s wildly overpriced for what is basically an underdevloped and incomplete title that only provides occasional glimpses at the inspired mayhem that could have been with a bit more love and care for “Naughty Bear.”

Naughty Bear
Photo credit: 505 Games

The concept is simple enough. You’re the unloved and ridiculed loner bear who has been mocked one too many times. It’s time for revenge. On the first level, you leave your lovely bear hiding spot and wreak havoc on a birthday party for a beloved “not-naughty” bear named Daddles. Kill off his party goers, destroy his gifts, don’t let anyone escape, and eventually end your murderous rampage with the beloved green bear himself.

Naughty Bear Photo credit: 505 Games

Your path to destruction is theoretically up to you. Feel free to sabotage the barbecue grill, lay traps around the village, or merely pick up a machete and hack your former tormentors to fluffy death. If a bear spots you, he’ll usually run and sometimes even call for help or try and escape via the one car apparently in town. Yes, bears have a police force that can appear via boat.

“Naughty Bear” places a lot of emphasis on a point system that’s racked up via different assignments on each level and through the creativity of the player. Creative combinations rack up more points than blunt force. And different levels have vaguely different focuses. For example, on one you’re not allowed to actually hit another bear, leaving your carnage to trap placement or careful sabotage. On another, you’re not allowed to take any damage yourself.

The different rules on different levels attempt to add a facade of variety to a title that’s woefully lacking in it. Having said that, a point-based game that plays not unlike an old-fashioned smash title like “Rampage” could have been a fun way to go, but “Naughty Bear” isn’t even refreshingly simple enough to pull that off. It’s stuck in that chasm of gaming Hell where the player can clearly tell that the developers tried a few things that weren’t quite completely driven through to the final stage.

Naughty Bear Photo credit: 505 Games

For example, the graphics are horrendous. I know it may seem cynical to pick on the graphics in a game about a killer teddy bear but there are levels of bad graphics that are unacceptable on the Xbox 360 and “Naughty Bear” crosses them. And shouldn’t this game be a visual treat first and foremost? It’s certainly not going to be about storytelling. When you hit another bear, your item of mayhem almost always swings right through them and they flatten out when they hit the ground. Characters run through corners of buildings and one another. It’s 2000 graphics in 2010. Like I said, perfectly acceptable for cheap DLC but not for a full-priced game. Even most DLC titles are outshining “Naughty Bear” on a visual level.

And, believe it or not, it doesn’t end there. Even with the nearly incomplete visuals, “Naughty Bear” could have worked with some well-refined controls. That didn’t happen either. The game is a random hodge-podge of visual cues on the screen like “A to Sabotage” and “RT to Kill” with no real sense of player control over the action. It’s all so random and frenetically conceived and designed that it’s never satisfying on a gameplay level. An announcer yells things like “It’s Naughty Time,” you hack away with the A button a few times, watch some bad graphics, and move on to the next level. I’m not asking for deep character in “Naughty Bear,” but did it have to feel so haphazardly put together?

And that’s the ultimate sin of “Naughty Bear.” After the great concept, it sure seems like it wouldn’t have taken too much effort to refine that concept into either a fun arcade-style point-racker of a game or a deeper story-based game. “Naughty Bear” never went anywhere after concept, as if they thought the idea behind the game would equal fun. It merely equals frustration. Send “Naughty Bear” to the punishment it deserves — the bargain bin.

By BRIAN TALLERICO Content Director HollywoodChicago.com brian@hollywoodchicago.com