‘Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time’ is Perfect Background Noise For Making Out

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CHICAGO – Historically, video game adaptations are recipes for disaster when translated into film. While “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” with Jake Gyllenhaal and Gemma Arterton has a blockbuster opportunity to buck the decades-old trend, we’re just subjected to more of the same soul-deadening time drain.

Rating: 2.0/5.0

“Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” will go down in history akin to other video-game-to-film failures including “Resident Evil: Extinction,” “Max Payne,” “Postal,” “BloodRayne,” “Doom,” “Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life,” “House of the Dead,” “Mortal Kombat,” “Street Fighter” and “Double Dragon”. The film only succeeds in its mindless entertainment and can be considered excellent background noise while you’re making out with someone at home.

The special effects are cheesy, the costuming feels forced, you can practically see the actual sets in various scenes and ultimately the film’s 116 minutes are about 110 minutes too long. Sure, the film looks like another Jerry Bruckheimer picture in some of its largesse, but so does it also get the same disrespect as a failed Uwe Boll video game adaptation.

Read Adam Fendelman’s full review of “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time”.

Audiences will have a love/hate relationship with veteran cinematographer John Seale (“Poseidon,” “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone,” “City of Angels,” “The Firm”) as his camera work teeters from true blockbuster skill to painfully amateur to watch. Likewise, parkour master David Belle serves up stunt work that totters just the same.

“Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” film writers Boaz Yakin, Doug Miro and Carlo Bernard should have hired an English-speaking translator for their conversation with “Prince of Persia” video game writer Jordan Mechner because their collaboration instead created a jumbled story that felt like you’re trying to understand Chinese.

Continue reading for Adam Fendelman’s full “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” review.

Jake Gyllenhaal (left) and Gemma Arterton in “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time”.
Image credit: Andrew Cooper; Disney; and Jerry Bruckheimer, Inc.

Continue reading for Adam Fendelman’s full “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” review.